Category Archives: Snap *censored* Pop Culture

USFL Distant Replay (Take 2)

Introduction (Welcome Back to the USFL)

You may be awaiting my reaction to the NFL Conference Championship Games. The honest truth is that I have none. I didn’t watch either game. I know enough about the outcomes to know that the Super Bowl is again a contest that I have little interest in watching, so the annual Lucas-Mullen anti-Super Bowl party can go off without a hitch. Besides there are other football leagues, like the USFL. Wait, what? Didn’t they fold over 30 years ago? Read on, faithful friends!

Instead, I’m going to take some time to announce a project that I’ve been thinking about reviving. It’s something that I messed around with back in the dark ages of the internet. It is football related. It notoriously happened in the spring. Yes, if those easy clues (and the dead give away in the title) weren’t enough of an indication, I will spell it out. I’m bringing back the USFL.

Spring football? It’ll never work. And it didn’t. But, this time it will.

Why the USFL?

I don’t want to be that a-hole, but let’s face it. I’m that a-hole. Why not the USFL? Other than the AFL, it was the most legitimate football league other than the NFL. Sure, it had problems. Big problems as I’m learning by listening to the audiobook, Football for a Buck by Jeff Perlman. But, as commissioner and limited demigod of the league, I can avoid all of those problems and write my own narrative of the league.

While I don’t have a definitive “This was my introduction to the USFL” like Perlman, I did know about the league as a kid. I have vague memories of certain players and teams, if not actual games. It was an oddity from my youth similar to the World Basketball League.

If you’ve never heard of the World Basketball League, look it up.
That was dysfunction at its finest.

I certainly never considered that I’d be the one to attempt to simulate the league not once, but twice. Then, the internet came along. I learned about a computer game that would simulate football games like the old electric football games. I saw that a fan web page had put together rosters for the 1983, 1984, and maybe even 1985 USFL teams.

During its first iteration, the USFL Distant Replay only made it through the 1983 season, but it was quite an endeavor. Having learned some HTML (yeah, this was a while ago), I put together a web page for the main league and all of the teams. I don’t know that I will be able to maintain that level of dedication, but I want to give the league another go.

Why Now?

I don’t want to get predictable, so I won’t respond with “Why Not Now?” Except, I sort of already did, didn’t I? But, rest assured that I didn’t want to do that. It’s just that I’m a dad. The dad jokes sort of come with the territory. I can’t help myself.

My personal all time favorite.

Just like the why the USFL, the why now isn’t terribly complicated. I noticed a few months ago on social media that Dave Koch sports was having a sale on their football game. I also picked up their hockey and basketball game, too. I haven’t yet spent money on the baseball or golf games.

Well, I used the football game to play around with a theory that I heard that the Patriots would be just as good or better with Aaron Rodgers but that Tom Brady wouldn’t make the Packers any better. I’m not sure how much I believe, but it did speak to my irrational Patriots hate, so I went along. Results were inconclusive. Playing the game brought up the memories of my misadventures with the USFL. The game has rosters available for the league. I heard about a book written about the USFL that I’m currently listening to while I do my night job. It just all sort of fell into place.

Okay, I’m Sold

That’s probably not true. I’m a terrible salesman, confirmed by my job working in sales at a local TV and appliance store. Still, I hope there is some interest in the league still and my attempts to not only bring it back, but allow it to flourish into a viable little brother to the NFL. As I said, I won’t be able to dedicate nearly as much time as I did before. Still, it should be a fun time and stay tuned for the launch of the USFL Distant Replay (take 2) sometime soon!

Completely Ignorant 2019 NFL Conference Championship Preview

Introduction

A few years ago, to fill in some of the dead time, I started talking about college and professional football on the page. I hadn’t watched the NFL with any regularity for several years at that point. So, I came up with a gimmick of the “Completely Ignorant” NFL pundit. I actually used the gimmick earlier in the season for a picks column through week 7 or 8. Then, the realities of life reduced my picks to clicking team logos on a FanDuel screen. Pardon my French, but c’est la vie. Oh well, on with my Completely Ignorant 2019 NFL Conference Championship preview.

I’m going to do this a bit differently. Having spent the better part of two hours last night listening to podcasts, I am no closer to knowing with any certainty who is going to win these games. Therefore, I’m going to rate each potential Super Bowl match up on a rigorous scale that I’ve developed. Each possibility will be given from 0 to 10 “Eff the Pats”. For reference, last year’s Super Bowl that forced me to root for the Eagles was 10 “Eff the Pats”. Also, in all honesty, I was rooting for the meteor last year.

2019 NFL Conference Championship Crystal Ball (Pats vs. Rams)

Don’t get me started on this TB12 nonsense…

I rank this one 8 “Eff the Pats”, always 5 from the actual Pats and 3 from the Rams. First, we’ve seen this matchup before. Sure, it was almost 20 years ago, but it was the start of this Patriots dynasty and the start of my slow descent into madness. It is well documented in text and on this site, so I won’t go into it unless this is the reality that we end up living in after tomorrow. What you might wonder is why 3 for the Rams? I just fear that they could become the new Pats with a “genius” head coach and an unproven quarterback. I’d rather put that off for as long as possible.

2019 NFL Conference Championship Crystal Ball (Pats vs. Saints)

I mean, seriously, this picture makes him look like he’s about to say “Aw shucks” or he just said it.

I give this one the requisite 5 “Eff the Pats”. If the Patriots have to make the Super Bowl again, at least give us a matchup that we haven’t ever seen before. Plus, I like the Saints. Drew Brees is the original underdog quarterback, but he never quite got to the annoying saturation point of “humble” Tom Brady. And, Sean Payton was once the hot new replacement for “genius” Bill Belichick, but that never materialized either. The Saints are sort of an alternate universe where the Patriots don’t become the bane of society. Finally, as black and actual gold, they become a good surrogate for my Steelers.

2019 NFL Conference Championship Crystal Ball (Chiefs vs. Rams)

Then there’s this guy who looks like he should be a lawyer for some shady Silicon Valley start up that’s been accused of rampant sexual misconduct.

I give this one the aforementioned 3 “Eff the Pats” for the Rams alone. The good part of this is that the Patriots are nowhere to be seen. There’s no chance of them somehow stumbling into another Super Bowl victory by a last second field goal in the “most exciting” Super Bowl ever. I love this version of the Chiefs and are meh about the Rams. If the Rams win the game, I can worry about their potential dynasty later.

2019 NFL Conference Championship Crystal Ball (Chiefs vs. Saints)

And the real MVP this year, Mahomes is already on one name status for me. Bring it home!

This one gets zero “Eff the Pats”. I can rest assured in the fact that neither the old Pats nor the new version will have any chance to build on nor start their narrative as the most successful franchise in NFL history. Either Mahomes or Brees is okay by me as the face of the league for the offseason. This is just the feel good story that I need for the next 6 months before the NFL season starts up again. With how feel good has been performing lately, that means there is no chance of it happening.

The Verdict

Overall, this year isn’t as objectionable as last year. I had to root against two teams last year and they both won. This year, I just have to put all of my bad mojo into the Patriots bucket. Done and done. I won’t be watching either of these games as it looks like I will be digging out from under a foot and a half of snow and maybe even playing in it for some of the time. All of you who are watching, enjoy it and give a few extra “Eff the Pats” for me.

DC Comics in 2018

Introduction

I’ve done articles for Spawn (the only Image title I currently collect and read) and Marvel in 2018. The natural progression is to do DC Comics in 2018. Well, forget it! Ha! The old bait and switch! I’m actually going to write my thesis on non Newtonian fluids and now you all are going to have to read it. There is literally no other way. Nope. Once you click on a web page, you are bound by ancient internet laws to have to read it the entire way through.

Okay, I think we got rid of the nerds with the word Newtonian and the squares who don’t like comics with talk of ancient internet laws. We are free to talk to our hearts’ content about Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Swamp Thing, Harley Quinn, Booster Gold, and I guess even Superman. Please don’t take offense at that comment. It’s just that traditionally Superman has been my least favorite hero. More on that later. Enough silliness. Let’s dive in to DC’s 2018.

Bendis, as he tends to do, has breathed life into an old and beloved character. More on that later!

DC is killing the competition. I don’t mean that literally. There are more comics and comic companies than at any time in history. Therefore, I might not even mean that universally. I don’t have a lot of time to read comics, so I probably missed 99% of what was released last year. However, they were able to convert a lifelong Marvel zombie such as myself to collect more than just Batman comics. In fact, for the first time, I’m collecting all of their major characters (think movies) and related titles.

The Good (DC Comics in 2018 killed the competition)

Speaking of Batman, Tom King’s Batman is probably my favorite version of the character. His writing has inspired me to reach out to him on Twitter more than once. He’s even liked and retweeted me once or twice! Okay, okay, nobody wants to hear about my Twitter nerdgasms. I’ll get back to the comics. I know that many didn’t enjoy the Batman “wedding” issue, but the whole construction of that book blew me away. Seriously, go back and read it with an open mind. I got chills more than once. It is incredibly moving.

I’m getting chills now just writing about it…

Bendis jumped ship from Marvel Comics to DC. It appears that one stipulation in his contract is that he got to steer the Superman ship. It started with the aforementioned Man of Steel comic. That single book got me interested in Superman in a way that I don’t think I’ve ever been, not even during the All-Star book in the 90s (2000s?) and I absolutely adored that book. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for BMB and Supes.

DC comics released their Giants series in partnership with Wal*Mart. I want to say that I was skeptical of the “partnership with Wal*Mart” tag, but who are we kidding. Let the millenials have their war on box stores. I love the fact that I can walk into one store and buy a car battery, some peanut butter cups, and rash cream all in one trip. Plus, the books are great and great value. There is one new story and three reprints for only 4.99. The Batman book is reprinting Hush. For a cheap ass nerd like me, these books are gold.

The Bad (DC Comics in 2018 is actually pretty great)

Ha! Gotcha! More good!

Honestly there’s not much bad that I can say about DC Comics. And, yes, that is said even with my perpetual warning that I find it difficult to completely condemn almost any creative project. Honestly, though, there’s not a single DC comic book that I’ve read recently that I have not completely enjoyed. They are all just solidly good.

I don’t enjoy the character as much as I do when Greg Rucka writes her, but Wonder Woman is decent. The Flash has been fun enough to keep me interested. That is Aiden’s favorite character and he voraciously reads every new issue that I get each month. Justice League is awesome, even if I like the companion JL Dark title better, but that’s just personal writer preference. Scott Snyder is fine, but I like Tynion better. Speaking of Tynion, I wish he was still writing Detective Comics. I enjoyed that book almost as much as the main Batman title and that’s saying something.

There’s simply not anything bad that I can say about DC Comics right now. What can I say? I’m just a positive person. Maybe that makes me a terrible critic. Seriously, though, what can you say about them? Unlike their main rival, Marvel, they’ve ironed out many of the wrinkles and they are just doing quality work.

The Ugly (DC Comics in 2018 struggles to make a good film)

Huge asterisk on this one and it remains to be seen for Aquaman.

Years ago, this would not have even been a consideration. Comic book movies were, by and large, crimes against humanity. Then, along came Sam Raimi to make a decent Spider-Man movie. Marvel went on to perfect the craft of comic book movies, got sold out to the undisputed leaders of entertainment and Disney took comic book movies to a whole other level.

DC Comics is struggling to keep up in this particular arms race. While I’m not as down on them for some of the movies (I enjoyed Batman vs. Superman, sort of), the only one that I can say I really liked so far is Wonder Woman. The rest I tolerate and make rationalizations for why they maybe weren’t as bad as they seemed. I still haven’t seen Aquaman yet, but I’ve heard the expected mixed reviews from people.

I don’t understand why DC movies are such a mixed bag. As I said, Marvel has given them the blueprint. Their television series are supposed to be good. I’ve only seen parts of Flash episodes, but it seems to capture the comics pretty well. Maybe because they’ve put so much into their comic talent, they don’t have the resources to dedicate to big budget action movies. Maybe they’re just cursed. For whatever reason, Marvel and Disney rule this space and look to do so for at least the next year.

The Verdict (DC Comics in 2018 makes me excited)

I am an unashamed, avowed, and lifelong Marvel zombie. Marvel got me into comics, kept me in comics, and brought me back to comics several times. With that being said, DC Comics are without a doubt my favorite books to read, by and large, every month when my pull list order comes. There are a couple of Marvel titles on the immediate read list, but the rest are all DC books.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s me actually caring about Superman for once in my life.

Heck, they’ve even got me excited about Superman. Not simply tolerating the character, but actively liking and looking forward to the book every month. I never thought I’d say that. Sure, their movies leave much to be desired, but they’re not in the movie making business. They’re in the comics business and their business right now is very good. I can’t wait to see what 2019 has in store.

Marvel Comics in 2018

Introduction

Marvel Comics in 2018 have been a bit of a mixed bag. Perhaps that is being too kind to them. I have made no secret of my status as a Marvel zombie for life. Marvel properties, namely the animated Spider-Man and Friends cartoon and the live action Incredible Hulk television show, introduced me to those heroes. When I then started to collect comics, Marvel books were the first ones that I bought. In fact, until Image started as a company, Marvel were the only books that I bought.

I have since branched out from that narrow focus. As my wife can attest, I collect a variety of comic books from all three of the bigger publishers. Perhaps it is this branching out. Maybe I am just getting older. Hey, it could even just be that DC has focused more on comics. For whatever reason, this is the first time in my life that my top 5 comics are not Marvel books.

Though, they have been killing it with the movies.

DC Comics famously rebooted their universe from the mess that was New 52 a few years ago. Marvel has tried the same a few times over the years, including their own version of the New 52. As a collector, this has caused some confusion with the sequence and numbering of their titles. They responded with their Legacy “not quite a reboot” reboot which also offered consistent and official numbering for their more recognizable books. Even this was met with some internet side eye as their numbering schemes were brought into question.

The Good (Marvel Comics in 2018 is back to basics)

We are on to the good section of the article, so let’s keep it positive. There has been some good to come out of this mess. I mentioned in the previous section that Marvel books might not have cracked my Top 5 last year. That’s a bit harsh. There are at least two books from Marvel that are near the top of my read list every month. Before I talk about them, I’ll mention the other books that I’ve been enjoying.

Dr. Strange is one of my favorite Marvel characters and the latest story of him losing his magic has been a fun story. The Extermination story grabbed and kept my interest. X-23 is written by one of my favorite writers. Captain America post Secret Empire is a cool exploration of the soul of the character and, to an extent, our country. Iron Man and Avengers are both decent. On to my two favorite Marvel books.

Another name and theme change for Hulk?

I was skeptical when I heard the announcement about The Immortal Hulk. A horror book? Starring Hulk? Okay, I’ll give it a shot. I’m glad that it did. The tone of the book is completely different, but it is back to the Jekyll and Hyde roots of the character. Highly recommended.

Speaking of horror vibes…

I am not as much of a Venom fan as Hulk, so I wasn’t sure what to expect out of this title. I had enjoyed the pre-Legacy story line of the symbiote being sick and Eddie needing to cure it. They have continued with that thread while also adding some of the same horror as in the Hulk title. I also recommend this book if you are just getting into comics.

The Bad (Marvel Comics in 2018 is inconsistent)

Intergalactic Empire? Again, okay…

Perhaps the epitome of this inconsistency is Black Panther. While many have only discovered the character because of the mega blockbuster movie that came out last year, I have been a fan of Black Panther since the beginning of my comic collecting. After starting with the big boys, I moved on to some of the secondary characters and enjoyed their stories more. I can’t quite put my finger on why I’m not enjoying this book more, but it just has not felt as fun or interesting as some of the others. Admittedly, I haven’t read it in a few months, so maybe it has fleshed out the concept better in the meantime.

Hot off the presses. That actually makes sense, but I meant to invoke the movie, so hot off the reels? That sounds dumb. Speaking of dumb, let’s move on.

If you know me at all, you know that I will give any creative outlet a chance. I’m a frustrated writer myself (imagine that, a failed novelist as blogger), so I understand all too well the crushing defeat of something you spent 10 years of your life on failing completely. Sorry, fell into therapy mode there.

With all of that being said, I didn’t like Infinity Wars. I really wanted to. I liked the first comic series and I loved the movie. I collected all of this title and even got the connecting covers. Then, I started to read it and it is a confusing mess. I don’t understand any of the motivation of the characters or reason for the plot. It was so bad, that I reconsidered my collection of the Infinity Warps offshoot books. I still have yet to buy any of them. Maybe Marvel needs to take a break from events.

The Ugly (Marvel Comics in 2018 is frustrating)

Worst year ever…

While I don’t want to sound like one of those internet guys who hates on everything, I’m going to do exactly that. This also probably is not entirely the fault of 2018. Marvel Comics has felt like a rudderless ship for several years now. They introduce new heroes, build them up for years, and then cave to the whims of those internet grumps and kill off those heroes. I get it. Sales drive industry. Perhaps I’m more frustrated with the grumps who won’t give something new a chance than with Marvel.

Comic books need to grow and change from their lonely nerd boy roots if they are going to continue. Perhaps the New 52 was the worst thing to happen to DC. Maybe Totally Awesome Hulk and Miles Morales Spider-Man were an anathema in the Marvel Universe. Spoiler Alert: I read both titles. They weren’t. Even so, comic sales have not kept up with the reality. Comic books are very popular except for the comics themselves. Maybe that is the reality. People that don’t buy comics never will. But, I commend the companies for continuing to try to find a new audience.

The Verdict (Marvel Comics in 2018 is in transition)

It’s been no secret that Marvel’s focus is more on its cinematic and television properties over the last decade. They have been building an integrated storyline over that time that they used to invest in their comics. Chris and I have had the conversation numerous times and I was under the impression that comics had become more or less a loss leader for the company under their Disney overlords. While that might be true to some extent, Marvel Comics still considers itself an integral part of the family.

It remains to be seen if that is actually true. When I go to comic shows, I do see people younger than me there. My kids are all into comics and read at least one title a month that I buy. Aiden likes Flash. Liam reads Batman. Quinn’s favorite is Teen Titans. I don’t know if they are going to continue to read comics past childhood. Maybe they’ll be like me and go into comics hibernation for a time until nostalgia brings them back.

Overall, I’m happy with what Marvel is doing with their comic books. If they can sustain this for a few years like DC has done with their Rebirth line, which has become the new DC universe, then I think they’ll be able to build their audience a little bit more. So far, so good. Quite an unsatisfying conclusion perhaps, but that’s the state of comics in 2018.

Spawn in 2018

Introduction

Seeing as how we are entering the 3rd week of the new year, I’m a bit behind on my 2018 retrospectives. Better late than never, right? Perhaps not, but there’s nothing I can do about it now. So, without much further ado, let’s start our look back at comics in 2018 with Spawn.

In the past, I might have titled this article as independent books, but probably not. I know that I’ve talked about independent books as a concept in the past. The truth is that I’ve only read Image besides Marvel and DC. Further, I gave up on The Walking Dead. Spawn is the only other Image book in my pull list. Perhaps that says something about the state of Image comics. More likely, it says something about me. Okay, on with the show.

The Good (Spawn in 2018 is surprisingly consistent)

I can’t speak on the past as comic book plots are notoriously inconsistent and require numerous reboots. I will say that, not having read Spawn for the better part of 5 (maybe 10), years, I still understood and followed the plot without a problem. That’s not always the case with some of the more recent attempts to redefine the various Marvel and DC properties.

I never read The New 52, but I’ve read that it was a disaster. Also, Marvel Legacy was pretty much DOA after trying to undo the new heroes they spent several years constructing.

Also, creative teams change quite often. Sure, you have the occasional team that stays together for a few years and writers tend to stick to a title for a long run. However, the recent trend seems to be to shuffle guys from title to title and even from company to company. I’m not sure if this is their attempt to keep things fresh and interesting.

Granted, Spawn isn’t all that different. Though, I will say that in the time I’ve been reading it, the title has had the same writer and artist for most of the issues. Also, Todd McFarlane isn’t as involved as he once was. Still, he writes occasionally and does a variant cover every now and then.

Speaking of variants, in this day and age of overpriced (in my opinion) variants, that hasn’t been the case with Spawn. Seeing as how I’m not quite the variant hawk that Chris is, I might be wrong. However, I am aware of many of the covers available and will buy the ones that I find interesting or attractive. The only variants that I’ve seen for Spawn were for cover price, which is great for a collector on a limited budget like me.

The Bad (Spawn in 2018 is showing its age a bit)

I don’t mean in the Old Man Logan way, either.

Even with all of the good about the comic, Spawn is beginning to show its age a bit. Seeing as how the book is 25 years old, that isn’t a surprise. However, I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t notice it while reading the title last year. It is still a fun title in the nostalgia sense, but I don’t know if it is something that would grab my attention if it wasn’t already something that I knew about. It is absolutely a title conceived in another time. This is only a minor gripe as they seem to be in the process of updating the title in terms of style and content. It remains to be seen if that continues.

The only other negative about the title is also nostalgic. Those of us who were there at the beginning of Image remember delay after delay. Some titles came out months after they were scheduled. It did little to dampen my excitement, but others were understandably upset. Most companies have been able to avoid significant delays. I probably wouldn’t have even noticed the delays in Spawn if not for the notifications from my online pull list. But, I noticed, and it’s odd that there are shipping delays in the age of on demand printing

The Ugly (Spawn in 2018 is a bargain)

Speaking of bargains, why can’t I get this book for cover price?

How is the comic book being a bargain an ugly? Also, $2.99 for a comic book? Is that really that much of a bargain? Let me answer those questions in reverse order. While I decry the price of comics, they actually haven’t increased as much relative to other things over the last 2 or 3 decades. Would I like nickel or dime comics? Sure, but that’s simply not realistic. Plus, Spawn is on the lower end of the price spectrum.

As far as the ugly, it is alluded to in the picture above. Let’s take one more nostalgic trip back in time. When I started reading Spawn again a couple of years ago, I noticed that it was close to issue #300. That inspired me to try to go back to fill in the issues I was missing. For the most part, that was easy. What is not easy is there is a run of book around the time of the cover in the picture that run anywhere from 20 dollars to over 100. As someone who doesn’t want to pay 3.99 for a book, 20 bucks is way too much. As I said in the previous section, we live in an age of on demand everything. Why can’t they reprint these books so that people can get their hands on them for cheaper than what the secondary market charges?

The Verdict (Spawn in 2018 is still worth collecting)

Sure, it is 25 years old and showing its age. But, they seem to be trying to change that somewhat. As with most renovations in comics, we will see if it continues, but I like what they’re doing so far. Focusing on Spawn’s daughter has proven to be an interesting story. There have been delays recently, but that doesn’t bother me too much. I think that they’ve figured it out and it is just one month delay that has continued for the past few months. The older issues are very expensive, but that’s the same with any collectibles. Overall, the story is strong, the art is cool, and the book is cheap compared to other books on the market today. If you are looking for something new and potentially different from other comic books, definitely pick up the most recent issue.

Completely Ignorant NFL Week 7 Picks

Introduction

Another week, another picks column. Another week, nothing but the picks column. Like I said a couple of week ago, I might need to consider changing the name of the web page. But, and this is important, two thing have happened. Chris is back from his trip to California, so we can record on the weekends. And, our weekend craziness is going to take a break with soccer finishing up soon and Liam’s play performance happening next month. That will free up a lot of time for us to record, too. Oh, I thought of another thing. Winter break happens for all of us in December and continues into January for me. That means we will definitely get this thing on track for the new year.

Until then, I’ll continue to amuse and amaze with my weekly picks column. After a 10-5 record two weeks ago, I went 11-4 straight up last week. I’m also plus .500 against the spread over the last two weeks.  Either what I said last week about the first 4 weeks of the season being crazy due to a shortened preseason and I’m getting the hang of things or the gambling gods are setting me up for a fall in the coming weeks. We shall see.

The Cosmic Joke of Thursday Night Football

A couple of weeks ago I stated that I would henceforth just be picking home teams on Thursday night football as they have an advantage and I’m quite busy during the week to pick a game before Thursday night. Well, the gambling gods responded to that challenge by making the Giants the home team last week and then the Cardinals this week. I suppose that says something for making such broad and sweeping proclamations. Needless to say, I did not pick the Cardinals this week.

Week 7 Picks

To hit my deadline, I need to just list the picks again. Going to scarecrow in the park and then a 2 year old’s birthday party.

Chargers over Titans in London

Pats beat the Bears, but I have Mitch in daily fantasy so hopefully their defense still stinks.

Colts roll the D3 Bills

Detroit steals a win in Miami

Vikes beat a surprisingly frisky Jets

Browns over the Bucs. What can I say other than God Bless the Browns.

Jags nip the Texans

C’mon New Orleans, beat the Rats

LA Rams stay undefeated against the 49ers

Dallas over the Racists

Chefs get back on track against Cincy

And, the Falcons beat the hapless Gynts

The Verdict

Nothing here to really get excited about. Certainly nothing on the order of the Chefs/Pats game last week. The Steelers are on a bye, which gives me the chance to talk about how I’ve gone from a life long Steelers fan to actively despising the team. See you next weekend.

Completely Ignorant 2018 NFL Week 6 Picks

Introduction

Last week represented either a course correction or a rare good week just to keep me gambling. Oh, you didn’t know that? Yes, gambling is a living entity that thrives on the stupidity of humans to continue to spend their money even after it has become abundantly clear that the odds are stacked against them. When you start to feel like things are turning against you, gambling convinces you that a “hot streak” is coming only to slap you in the face with huge losses.

What that all means is that I was 10 and 5 straight up last week. Moreover, after a week in which I was considering not picking against the spread and surely not gambling on them, I went a somewhat respectable 8 and 7. So, maybe the first four weeks of the season are just an aberration with the shortened practice and preseason schedule. Wait, no! Gambling, you won’t get me that easily.

A Note on Thursday/Laziness

So, just last week I made the declaration that I would just pick the home team in every Thursday night game to prevent having to meet a Wednesday deadline. I suppose I could just pick the Thursday night game at the end of this article every week. Wait, no! This isn’t about me taking responsibility for my actions.

Well, the universe played quite the joke on me by making the Giants the home team this past week against the Iggles. Sure the Iggs have been having a rough time of it this year, but they can beat Eli and the Giants without breaking a sweat. So, I guess there are a few lessons to be learned. Good for me, I haven’t been in school for over 20 years.

Week 6 Picks

Tampa Bay at Atlanta: Like the Iggls, the Falcons have had a rough year. They just got destroyed by the Steelers and are 1-4 on the season. I guess Kyle Shanahan was the offense. Tampa Bay started as everyone’s darlings and then Ryan Fitzpatrick’s deal with the devil ran out. He should talk to Tom Brady’s guy. Either way, I think the Falcs can beat the Bucs.

Cincinnati at Pittsburgh: Those who have been reading for a while know that I was born in Pittsburgh in the 1970s. I had no choice. I was a Steelers fan. Earlier in the year, I heard that Big Ben was accused of getting feely with Stormy Daniels and it broke me. I am no longer a Steelers fan. It’s only a coincidence that they stink this year. They might beat the Bengals, but that doesn’t make them good. You just never know with divisional games. I pick the Bengals.

Los Angeles Chargers at Cleveland: I was watching football at the in laws house last week. The Browns/Ravens game was on. By the end of the game, I was openly rooting for the team that in my childhood I hated with a passion of a thousand suns. I was also texting Chris and during the game I said, “God Bless the Browns.” Unfortunately, I think the Chargers win this one.

Chicago at Miami: Miami has fallen back to earth after being beaten by the Pats a couple of weeks ago. Chicago pulled off the trade of the season by landing Mack. So far, I’ve pulled off one of the waiver steals of the season by grabbing Chitown’s defense in fantasy after Week 1. Trubisky won’t ever have a game like he did last week again, but this defense can win games as long as he doesn’t lose it.

Seattle at Oakland: It has been fun to root against Jon Gruden this season. He was insufferable years ago and became even more so as an announcer in the interim. Everyone was predicting good things for him and the Raiders this year. Then, he got quite a start by trading away their best defensive player and things got even better when he complained about not having a pass rush. Go Seahawks.

Arizona at Minnesota: Minnesota is favored big in this game, but I don’t see it. They already laid an egg earlier against the other D3 team, Buffalo, but their defense hasn’t been as intimidating this year as it was last year. They’ll beat the Cardinals, but Arizona might make it a game.

Indianapolis at New York Jets: A few years ago, a friend said something about Seattle when we were talking about football. I replied, in earnest, “Seattle has a football team?” I’m starting to feel that way about Indianapolis. Plus, the Jets have a good young QB. I think the Jets can hang and possibly win.

Carolina at Washington: We live in a country where the nation’s capital football team has a racial slur as a nickname. Further, the owner is a rich white guy who stubbornly refuses to change the name. Screw DC and screw their racist nickname. Go Panthers.

Buffalo at Houston: Houston is inexplicably favored by 8.5 points. I know that I (half) jokingly refer to Buffalo as one of the NFL D3 teams, but that’s just insane. I guess they think that DeShaun is going to eventually break out and find his rhythm and this is as good a game as any. I just don’t see it, even if I think they’ll win.

Los Angeles Rams at Denver: I’m all in on the Rams and Chiefs this year. They had a hiccup against Seattle last week, but again, divisional games are weird. You just never know. I thought they’d destroy the Broncos and they still might. It’s running game strength against weakness. My friend just texted me a picture of snow in Denver. Winter is coming indeed.

Jacksonville at Dallas: Dallas stinks on ice this year. I’m not sure if it’s the coach or what, but it does feel like they should be much better than they are, so I guess so. Jacksonville is up and down from week to week. This is a tough game to pick and I’d never bet it, but I’ll go with the Jags being back up this week.

Baltimore at Tennessee: Well, if Indianapolis is fading from my memory, then Tennessee isn’t far behind them. I guess we could just take the whole AFC South and throw them out and I’d not miss a single wink of sleep. Baltimore, even with their loss against the Browns last week, are a decent team. I’ll take them.

Kansas City at New England: Chris and I have been texting about this game for a couple of weeks. Before last game, where he finally looked human, I kept saying that Mahomes was going to rip the Pats pass defense several new ones. I just can’t pick against the Pats at home until it starts to happen. Rooting for KC, but picking NE.

San Francisco at Green Bay: San Fran is another one of those teams that had high hopes at the beginning of the season. Those went a bit up in smoke when Jimmy G-sus got hurt. Rodgers has been hurt, too, but the Packers are still a fun team. I think they can win, but I don’t see them covering.

The Verdict

Week 6 is slightly more interesting than the last two weeks. Can Mahomes and the Chefs really take that next step and beat the Pats? Or, will Andy Reid take form and doom them to a 4 or 5 game losing stream like last year? How will the Rams do in weather? How many players will die in the Steelers/Bungles game? So, a few games worth watching. I, on the other hand, will be avoiding all football because I think this is the week that my fantasy team lays an egg. For those watching, enjoy!

Image Comics in the 2000s

A Note

We return, perhaps triumphantly, to the content that has made us famous? Well, famous in our circles, anyway. Okay, so it’s not strictly gaming content yet. That’s coming next week. But, it is more a more nerd oriented article. One other is coming later in the week and I’m going to edit a podcast to release this week. We will be back to gaming content with a podcast with the Gamer Bros. and some companion articles.

Introduction

I’ve already taken a trip back to Marvel in the 1990s and 2000s and also DC in the 1990s and 2000s. The one other constant in my comic collecting life has been Image. I’ve also talked about my history with them in the 1990s. All that’s left is a trip to visit Image in the 2000s. Consequently, and not surprisingly, this is that trip.

Marvel’s Civil War got me back into comics in the 2000s. DC’s Infinite Crisis expanded my knowledge of comics to previously unknown characters and stories. Images was more of a habit. I don’t mean to say that I didn’t enjoy the books. It’s just that they weren’t a driving force behind my collecting. As usual, let me explain better.

You’re saying our time meant nothing to you? Um, I, well, no, that’s not what I’m saying. I’d said I’d explain better.

The Walking Dead

Today, The Walking Dead is a big deal. Sure, it’s isn’t as big of a deal as it maybe was 3 or 4 years ago, but it is still on television and my youngest wants to be a zombie for Halloween. So, it’s wormed its way into the public conscience. Back then, it wasn’t nearly as big of a deal. I found the title in a similar manner as the Infinite Crisis. As I wandered through the store looking for Marvel Civil War titles, I saw “The Walking Dead”. Huh, I thought, a comic about zombies. That seems cool.

It seemed even cooler as I read more about it. The writer, Robert Kirkman, sold it as the zombie story that happens after the credits roll in a typical zombie movie. Always on the search for something unique, that intrigued me. Sure, we all love the old school stories like Night of the Living Dead.

Though, if I’m being plainly honest, I’m pretty sure that society would return to normal, a la Shaun of the Dead instead of the post apocalyptic horror that Kirkman presents in his stories.

At least for me though, what kept the zombie genre interesting for so long were the second and third generation stories. Danny Boyle introduced the “not quite zombie” zombie apocalypse. Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg, and Nick Frost gave us a love story–with zombies. Max Brooks wondered how a documentary style zombie apocalypse might look. And Robert Kirkman explored the slow destruction of all semblance of society and found that humans are actually the much bigger threat.

I stayed with The Walking Dead even after my LCS had to close up shop. While I had been buying both issues and trades, I started buying only trades online when the store closed. Eventually, I stopped buying even those. I stopped watching the show for the same reason. In an effort to constantly up the ante, they focused more on shock value than entertainment. They became what most horror becomes. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

Aiden asked about AHS the other day because we’re introducing him to the genre. Christine said something and I more or less echoed her thoughts. The first season was good, the second season was okay, and the rest of them were not worth watching.

Spawn

The only other Image book that I collected at this time was Spawn. I often talk about my history of comics as beginning with Marvel Comics. While that isn’t strictly untrue, it wasn’t actually comics that served as my introduction. Instead, as I suspect it is with many people my age, I discovered comics through campy 70s and 80s television shows.

My true introduction to actual comics came in the 1990s. As a result, my first comic book love belongs to Spawn. It probably doesn’t seem like it now, but the book was groundbreaking. One, it almost single handedly kept Image viable during those lean early years. That’s not entirely what I mean.

Image seemed like such a good idea. It was sold so well that they got many industry giants to buy into it. While initially, it looked like the whole experiment might blow up in their faces, they eventually figured out who they are.

 

Many things that we take for granted in comics today originated in Spawn. Instead of newsprint, he opted for the glossy magazine type paper that allowed for sharper lines and more vibrant colors. This showcased his art in a way that made the book feel like, well, art. Gone were the days of the funny books. Instead, comics became eye catching and true collector’s items. Also, does anyone remember the CCA? G? The fact that I can’t even remember the letters even though I grew up under the tyranny of that all seeing logo shows that most younger fans probably don’t know what I’m talking about. We owe at least some of that to Uncle Todd and Image telling them to shove it.

The Verdict

The Walking Dead and Spawn. Two books that kept an entire publisher relevant for me for a few years. They’ve always been a smaller studio and creator driven. Other than those two, not much else from Image has crossed over into other pop culture like Marvel and DC. I don’t think that’s a bad thing. As DC has shown, it’s not easy to make quality comic book movies. Then again, Marvel does have a decade head start on them. Not all of those early Marvel efforts are masterpieces, either.

However, this article isn’t about Marvel or DC. So, let’s get back on track. The only reason I mention movies is that there are plans for another Spawn movie. Alas, in a couple of weeks or months, I will talk about that. For now, I will praise Image as the little studio that could.

Just chug-chug-chugging along.

They were born out of the ashes of a colossal exodus of talent from the big two. They survived on the back of Spawn and later The Walking Dead. 20 years later, they seem to have found their niche as the place for writers and artists to go to test out new ideas and work on projects that didn’t quite fill the traditional mold. Sure there are others in this space, but Image is the undisputed king.

Completely Ignorant 2018 NFL Week 5 Picks

Introduction

Week 4 went very horribly wrong against the spread. I was a respectable 7 and 6 again to go 7 games over .500 straight up, but could not pick a spread to save my life. As this is an experiment, I have a couple of hypotheses. First, maybe the NFL is weird with only 4 preseason games and things don’t start to settle down until Week 5 or 6. Two, and possibly more likely, is that I’m not a sharp and I don’t have the time or the inclination to be one.

I’m still going to keep track of picks against the spread to see if things improve over the next few weeks. If they don’t, then my 10 or whatever dollars every week that I plan to bet starting next year will just go to money line bets. I don’t mind throwing money away, but I’d rather have a chance every now and then to win my money back.

A Note About Thursday Night Football

Have I said how much I hate Thursday night football? Not this week in this article, so here goes. Craig texted me at about 8 pm on Thursday with the news that Sony Michel was starting on our fantasy team and he hoped I was okay with that. I didn’t get the text until it was too late to do anything about it, but told him what my plans would have been. Cut to us texting back and forth with updates for every single yard he gained until he got the garbage time TD. All of fantasy is garbage time and I love to hate it. Oh, I picked the Pats. Let’s just say that I pick the home team every week on Thursday so I don’t have to feel bad about missing that deadline.

Week 5 Picks

Another week in just under the deadline, so just the picks, Ma’am.

Baltimore over Cleveland

Kansas City continues to roll against Jacksonville

Tennessee rolls Division 3 Buffalo

Carolina beats the hapless Giants

Denver over the weirdly favored Jets

Vegas has no idea what to do with the Falcons and Steelers. Neither do I, but I’m out on Pittsburgh. Falcons roll.

Green Bay gets another key divisional victory over the Lions

Cincinnati limps into a tie with Baltimore in the division lead after destroying the once heralded Dolphins.

Chargers return Gruden and the Raiders to their losing ways

Arizona hasn’t had their “Hey, we’re an NFL team, too” game like the Bills did against the Vikes, right? Maybe this is it and they beat the 49ers

Minnesota reminds Iggles fans what it used to be like

Jared Goff and the Rams destroy Seattle’s depleted secondary

Houston over the Crybabies of Dallas

Finally New Orleans rolls the Washington Racists

The Verdict

Week 5 isn’t as bad as week 4 was, but it’s a busy weekend for our family. We already spent the better part of yesterday at a local festival and we are scheduled to do so again today. Not that I’m the football fan that I used to be, but there’s nothing here that would keep me home. Heck, after Michel got 20 points the other day, I’m not even going to watch my fantasy team this week.

Completely Ignorant 2018 NFL Week 4 Picks

Introduction

It is most definitely a good thing that I have chosen to take at least this year as a trial run before putting any actual money down on this silly league. I went 5-11 last week against the spread, but did much better straight up 10-6. I knew that it was going to be a bad week when the corpse of the Buffalo Bills was up 21 points on the double digit favorite Minnesota early in that game. Oh well, put it behind me and forge on to Week 4.

A Note about Thursday Night Football (Week 4)

I thought that the Vikings would be able to keep the game close, so I picked them with the spread, but I knew that the Rams would win the game. During the Steelers/Bucs game I texted Chris, “All I know is that KC and LAR are good. The rest of this league is a toss up.”

Week 4 Picks

Once again, to get in under the deadline, I’m only giving picks. No witty comments about the games. However, I’m starting to figure out the schedule of the semester, so witty will be back next week. Maybe I’ll even be able to post an article or two not about sports. Over the last month, this has been 2 Guys talking about the NFL. And, I’m not even that big of a football fan anymore.

Cincinnati at Atlanta (-5): Falcons

Detroit at Dallas (-3.5): Lions

Buffalo at Green Bay (-10.5): Buffalo

Philadelphia (-3) at Tennessee: Eagles

Houston at Indianapolis (-1.5): Colts

Miami at New England (-7.5): Miami

Jets at Jacksonville(-9): Jags

Cleveland at Oakland (-2.5): Browns

Seattle (-3) at Arizona: Seahawks

New Orleans (-3.5) at Giants: Saints

San Francisco at LA Chargers (-9.5): 49ers

Baltimore at Pittsburgh (-3): Steelers

The Verdict

Overall, Week 4 isn’t very compelling. There are a few good games (Bal/Pit, Miami/NE), but nothing that will keep me glued to the computer screen. Simmons and Sal have called these weeks “apple pickers” because you can spend time with your family instead of watching football. I don’t have such a dilemma and we didn’t get paid this week, so apple picking isn’t an option. However, I do have some yard work to do, so maybe I’ll call these “yard work” weeks.