Introduction
Last time I dmitted that I forgot how Max’s story ended last season. This time, I’m afraid that I have to admit that a rewatch was absolutely necessary to write these summaries. Never binge 5 episodes of a television show while sipping wine. Only bad things can happen. With that warning out of the way, here’s my Fallout episode 11 plot summary.
Thaddeus’ Chain Gang
Thaddeus sipping from a cup.
Kids working on something in the background. Twitsting caps off of bottles. He encourages a kid. “Thanks, Boss!” He notices a kid falling asleep on the job. “Know what happens? Nothing good, that’s for sure.” Kid gets back to work. “We’re only 12 hours into the shift. 10 more to go.” “Trhy it without the gloves. The meat will help. Keep it up and you’ll have big gross calloused hands in no time.” “Lois called me a bad name. She said I looked like a ghoul.” Nothing wrong with that. You’re not. I am. That kid over there. Yeuch. “Reminder, we’re all lucky to be here. Believe me. I’ve sen some shit out there.” *keeps blabbing” “What do we always say?” All: “Most kids are dead by this age.” He smiles and goes back to drinking.
Title screen
The Legion
Open on Lucy and the stranger being led into an encampment by the weirdos. Someone is being whipped. Many people are screaming. Keep up, they prod Lucy. She’s mortified at the behavior. A couple weirdos roll a cannon by. Into a tent. A guy in a squid mask. “You lost your legionnary” to the stranger. Then slit her throat.
THE LEGION
They take Lucy to some dude. The guy with the squid mask takes it off (you’ll recognize him.) “Ave, profligate.” Lucy approaches the leader looking dude. “Hi, sir.” “How dare you approach the great Caesar (subtitles helpfully tell us they pronounce it Kaiser)?” “Kai-sar. Do you mean Caesar? Kaisers were German and you have more of a Roman theme.” Lucy knows because she’s a school teacher. “I-I think it’s Caesar.” She again approaches him. “I see this is a work camp.” They’re negotiating the rights to her prima noctis. First of all, shame on you. Second of all, it’s not even a Roman tradition. It comes from the middle ages. Nasty people borrwing a Latin phrase. I want to respect your traditions. We’ve come to a line. Also, I’m not a virgin. Not even counting the cousin stuff.
They tie her up. We are at war. With who…Basically everyone, but they must defeat the others from another legion. There’s two Caesars? Well, the first one died and they’ve been at war over who should take over ever since. Who is the heir. There’s a note in his pocket of the true heir. They are at a stalemate. Lucy has experience in family counseling. Conflict resolution is easier than you think. She ends up crucified. “This isn’t Rome. It’s America?” “Is it” “Yes, at least that’s what it says on the maps.” “Maps drawn by the dead. All that remains of America is it’s overwhelming failure. (Heh)” “If you think everyone else is the bad guy, chances are you are.” “Good is not a vector in history. Only strength *eye roll*
What Fate The Ghoul
| Back to the hospital. The ghoul is in bad shape. Dragging himself to rest on an empty pool. Dogmeat comes in and lies down. He sardonically chuckles. Checks out the wound. “How about a boat that’s not a boat. Know what I mean? Of course you do.” Take out one plank, same as it ever was. Just got a hole in it. Take out a lot of planks. You gotta ask yourself. What the fuck am I looking at? This ain’t a boat. It’s just a pile of wood, Man.” All as he’s cutting the poison out of his leg. “I don’t know what I’m telling you this all for. I know you already know all this.” *pets Dogmeat* “It’s just been a while since I had someone worth talking to. That’s all.” |
Charlie Gets a Lighter
| We all knew a flashback was coming here, right? Coop in the house. Barb is crying. He goes to her. She’s packing a “keep sakes” box. He just watches. Then, “You okay” “Yeah, I uh—I just can’t seem to get Janey’s teddy into the Keep sake box. For the vault. I hate to leave anything behind, you know?” He tries to reassure her. She looks a picture “I gotta go to this thing for Charlie.” He leaves, looks back. Mitch Miller, “The Yellow Rose of Texas” At a VFW event. Coop asks about Robert House. His friend fills him in. “You know what your new boss wants me to do.” “I don’t know” But, he does. “I want to help. I’ll do anything I can. Anything else.” Half the guys in here have killed people, just not the right ones, maybe. “Robert House is just one man.” Congresswoman Diane Welch gives a speech. She’s the only one not to take coroporate funding. Someone heckles her. “Okay” she reluctantly goes on blabbing about them and their great service. She looks for the card and drops them. Crowd laugh. Coop goes to “hit the head”. Guy in the bathroom: “Getting any awards tonight?” “No here for a friend” “Corporal Charles Whiteknife” “Yeah, yeah, Charlie” “Rumor has it he’s a bit of a pinko.” I wouldn’t know about that. “What about you?” What about me?” “…pinko?” “Don’t believe everything you read.” “I agree with their philosophy….if you ask me.” “I didn’t ask you.” … “Back a body into a corner. Now back a million bodies into the corner. Everyone trying to solve the same problem. Messy, messy, hmm?” Cooper nods. “I take it you’re not a vet.” “What gave me away?” “A vet would know better than to talk politics when a man has his dick in his hand.” Cooper leaves. The guy smiles and bids him farewell. |
The Sword Develops Another Edge
Back with the Brotherhood. Shot of the airships outside of Area 51.
More chatter about the Brotherhood and their rebellion. Then some history of the Brotherhood. A guy, Roger Maxson, asked himself who he served, his God or his government. He shot everyone because they defied his God. He wasn’t punished. He was saved so that he could found our noble order. If our rebellion is righteous, the way will be paved for us. Quintus has a way with words. But it ultimately doesn’t work. “Give the cold fusion relic to the Commonwealth.”
Max: “My lord. This Xander guy. I could just kill him. Well, that’s what we do here. Isn’t it.” Quintus nods. “Behold, the dimness of the sword. We just lost the alliance. If we kill Xander, the emmisary from the Commonwealth it will be war. And without the support of the other chapters, it will end with all our heads on spikes.” “Yes, but if our cause is righteous.” “I HAVE NO NEED FOR THE WORDS OF A SWORD. Leave. Must I repeat myself.” “No, my lord.”
Max is pissed. Xander heads him off as he walks. “What do you want?” “My arrival seems to have put a damper on the conversation.” You have a lot of clerics. Skittering around like cockroaches. Every chapter is different but this one sucks. Xander tries to convince him that the elder cleric is wrong and they are the bastions against chaos. It’s guys like them who keep things moving. The clerics just stand around and give speeches. “We are the ones who bleed.” If we figure something out, it won’t be the first time that cooler heads prevail over civil war. “What do you say.” “Yeah, let’s talk.” “Hot dog.”
Howdy, Pardner
The Ghoul has caught up to Lucy and the Legion. He watches. “Well, Miss Lucy. How’s that Golden Rule working out for you now? What the fuck?” *sighs* “Kinda looks like we got ourselves a civil war. Well, shit, what you think dog?”
The Ghoul hits the inhaler. “Don’t look at me like that. I don’t like her either. But we’re going to need her down the line. I’m not going up against two legions in one afternoon. We’re going to need some help.” Walks into a NCR encampment. Used to be the best place to get such help. Encampment looks empty. Encampment is empty. Enters a buidling. Seems to be looking for something. Finds some pills. *sighs* A Victor powers up. Victor fills him in. Eventually he gets to it. “Where’s Robert House?” “He’s gone. Had all the money in the world but all he wanted was to live forever.” He needed that cold fusion doodad. Didn’t you have something to do with that? Way back when? Ghoul realizes it’s time to take off. Victor spills about rangers in the hills. “I’ll be seeing you.” “I’m sure you will.”
Hot Dog
Back to the Brotherhood.
Xander brings Max along. He has a spare armor that Max can use. “They give you spares?” They shoot the shit as they fly. Then Xander gets real. If he doesn’t get the relic, they will be shooting at one another. If he gets the relic no bloodshed. Things are bad back east. They could lose the Commonwealth. If that happens, civilization falls. What else can happen. Look at it. It can get worse, trust me. Something blips on the radar. Why worry about a couple of robots in the desert? “We’re the Brotherhood of Steel. We keep the Wasteland safe. This is what we do. This is what we get to do.” Hot dog.
The NCR
| The Ghouls finds the rangers in the hills. Gunshot “Captain Rodrigues of the New California Republic. THE NCR. “Well I see your salutations haven’t changed.” Gun butt to the face. “Stop. Don’t hurt him.” “Why not?” “This Ghoul and the NCR go way back.” “If I may, the New California Republic may want to drop ‘New’ because y’all looking dusty as hell. Where is everybody.” They’ve been cut off from reinforcements for decades. They used to have a batallion in Shady Sands. That was over 20 years ago. He came in the hopes that the good guys would prevail. The things that the NCR fights for. Word is he used to believe in them too. She offers him meds. “Ain’t nobody comin’ Because ain’t nobody left. One piece of advice that kept me going over the years. When something’s dead it’s usually because it deserved to die.” He walks off. |
Max and Xander FSU
Max and Xander break in with their armor. “All right bro. Let’s do this.” A securitron robot, severly compromised comes up on them and starts shooting. It flashes the “Please Stand By” screen as it does. Xander charges with a flamethrower as the Star Spangled Banner plays. They fight with Xander doing most of the damage. He pulls Max into the fight, too. Max punches through the screen and ends it. Fist bump. “Gee whiz. That felt good.” They hear another one. Hot dog.
One Civil War…
| Crucified Lucy. Still chaos and misery in the camp. She’s severely dehydrated. Another person is being eaten by crows. She starts hallucinating. A crow lands on her cross. Spurs in the background. She sees the Ghoul. Or does she? Yep. He’s on his way to chat with Kaiser. Tips his hat. “Ah way. Or whatever the fuck you say to each other.” “You have information for Kaiser?” “The legion don’t believe in the linear progression of time. Or the soft ‘C’ for that matter. But I understand you still believe in cause and effect.” Quid pro quo. How about we put you on a cross? “Or you could stamp out the last remnants of the New California Republic. I can tell you where they’re hiding.” |
| Charlie’s telling a story to the vets. He’s in his armor, dragging someone through the snow. Who? Cooper Howard. You know what he said to me. Coop? You remember? “How do I look?” *laughter* He said, “How are the others? Nearly burned alive and he was worried about our squad. Fucking marines, huh?” Goes back to waxing poetic. |
| Lucy is freed as Charlie continues talking. Spurs. Ghoul’s shadow. Lucy looks up. He kneels down. Picks her up and carries her off. Charlie’s still talking about how great they are. They walk out as the Legion cheers. Charlie’s still blabbing. He thanks them. Cooper is deeply affected by his words. Charlie gets his award and a commemorative lighter. Everyone claps. |
| The Ghoul and Lucy walk. “Don’t thank me yet.” Charlie gives Cooper his lighter. “This is for you. They gave me that for saving a man. Not for killing the three it took to do it.” Pats Cooper on the shoulder. Cooper lights the lighter. He’s still got it after all these years. “Maybe this was a mistake.” “Why? What’d you do?” “Maybe something good. Maybe something stupid.” An explosion in a Legion camp and the civil war breaks out. Lucy and The Ghoul walk |
…Deserves Another
Xander and Max make their way through the area. A spinning bottle. Someone (a ghoul kid) under the conveyor. It’s all coming together. Max “Oh no. No.” Xander opens his visor. “It’s just a baby abomination. Hey buddy. Where are your friends. Where there’s one there’s always another.” Xander calls them to come out. We won’t hurt you. More kids come out from hiding. “Oh, jackpot. Were you playing hide-and-seek. I love that game.” Max” It’s okay.” “Yeah, you’re all okay.” Xander splits them into smooth and wrinkles. “Smooth skins close your eyes.” Max tries to stop him. Xander doesn’t listen. Thaddeus jumps out from under the conveyor to try to talk him out of it. “They’re not kids. They’re abominations. And so are you.” Max “But they are kids.” Xander quotes the codex. Max: Fuck the codex. Listen to me. Xander squeezes the trigger. Max slams him on the head with the hammer part of the flamethrower. Xander collapses. Thaddeus: Hey man, what you been up to? Max: I think I just started a war. Thad: Okay Well, uh, I’m the floor manager here. So it sounds like we both have a lot going on here.