Introduction

The second entry in the most anticipated July movie season in recent memory released this week. The first was Jurassic World. Next is Fantastic Four in a couple of weeks. A few of our friends saw the movie in early screenings on Thursday. We waited until yesterday and went as a family. As I watched the movie, I wondered how to frame this Superman (Gunn Version) review.

I considered writing a straight review of the movie. However, that rarely fits with my style. So, I tried to think of other ways to write it. The most obvious, and my final choice, revolves around the “controversies” of the movie. As I wrote on social media earlier in the week. Superman is not woke. You’re just a terrible person.

Really? Okay, Fine, Let’s Do This

SyderBots vs. James Gunn’s Superman: I saw this one early in the development of the movie. Snyder’s fans came out of the woodwork to bash the casting of David Coronswet. They further went on to say that the movie looked too “cartoony”. It’s a fucking comic book movie, you cretins! They absolutely lost their shit when Krypto showed up on the sneak preview trailer. Look, I hated Snyder’s take on Superman. But, I gave it chance after chance and watched every single one of the movies. Except the Snyder Cut. By that time, they exhausted me and I gave up. I mean, these dudes are just deranged. And, I like the meta commentary of the infinite monkeys in the movie. That’s what I’ll call them from now on.

Truth, Justice, and a Better Tomorrow: Other than the fact that Superman debuted in a country famous for jingoism, I never understood the “American Way” version of the original slogan. Besides, why is the default always the “United States” of America. We named two whole ass continents America. And, even so, they only represent a small fraction of the world population as a whole. So, Superman, a dude who flies around the world and saves everyone equally, now represents that world’s population. The absolute horror. Seriouly, folks, shut off that right wing echo chamber and take a breath.

Note: My SEO addon suggests that I limit my subheadings to less that three hundred words. As a result, I moved this one to its own subheading.

Superman is Woke?

Let’s ignore, for a moment, that the word woke has lost all meaning. The infinite monkeys did what they always do. They co-opted something good and turned it into something bad so that they could relentlessly attack it. I used to joke that “woke” became their new word because they couldn’t use the N-word. It’s not a joke anymore because now they do the same with DEI. I watched the movie. Yes, it leans into the theme of Superman as an immigrant. James Gunn chose that theme to appeal to your empathy. If you can accept Superman, the ultimate illegal immigrant, as a good person, maybe you can apply that empathy to actual living human beings. Human beings that now find themselves being threated with swamps filled with alligators.

I never thought I’d have to say it, but if you’re rooting for people to be eaten by alligators, you’re not a good person. They named the guy who wanted to do that Dr. Evil, for the love of all that is holy. What breaks inside of you that makes you pick on those weaker than you? Why punch down? What gains come from that? Meanwhile, the people who always harm society and the planet continue to commit actual violence against us and our environment. Lex Luthor, the soulless capitalist perverting and exploiting everything to his whims. I know people want to sound smart, by positing “there’s no true good or evil”, but why can’t we agree that the d-bags who hoover up all the money and leave us fighting for scraps probably aren’t the heroes that we make them out to be? I mean, any time something horrible happens, it can always be traced back to them and their decisions.

We Live in Parody

I never thought I’d see the day when Superman became controversial. Above, I told people to shut off Fox News. At this point, that should just be a given. They paid out numerous fees and penalties. They admitted in a court of law that they qualify as “entertainment” and not “news”. Yet, they continue to break ratings records. Unreal.

Lately, I advocate for kicking everyone off social media for 5 years or so. Give us all time to reset our brains and interact with one another without the algorithm telling us who to hate. Yes, even rich people. Repeatedly, I talk about guillotines or wood chippers. However, if we force rich people to start interacting with poor people, things might change. Get rid of charter schools and make the rich kids come back to public school. Rezone everything for affordable housing and prevent them from owning multiple properties until everyone has a home.

See how quickly they change the rules to better fund public insitutions. Also, require people to vote. As it stands, only the crazies on the right and the centrists have a voice right now. Everyone needs to get out and give their opinions. Restore balance. Otherwise, kiss it all good-bye. We’ve seen this story and it never ends well.

The Verdict – Superman (Gunn Version) Review

The TLDR of my Superman (Gunn Version) Review: I loved it. Christine asked if it was accurate to the comics. I replied, “There’s been 700 different Superman characters, so it’s tough to say.” What I can say is that this version of Superman followed the character the most closely since the Christopher Reeve movies. We don’t need a grittier version of Superman. One, it already exists in at least three forms (Brightburn, Omni Man, and Homelander). Two, Superman represents those things; truth, justice, and a better future. For everyone.