Do you want to say it? Or, should I? I guess I have the floor. I will say it. What’s this? Actual gaming content on this gaming web page? Yeah, I know. Cheap joke. I still chuckle every time I write it. Okay, with the silliness over, I can concentrate on Kaldheim: Esper edition preview.
Well, maybe just a little bit more of silliness. If you’re new here, don’t fret. I promise we offer more than terrible Dad jokes. Admittedly, not much more, but this article reviews white, black, and blue cards for the latest Magic the Gathering set, Kaldheim. It comes after the set already released for several reasons. I apologize for that.
Instead of rehashing those reasons in detail (mostly that school keeps kicking my butt on a weekly basis), let’s concentrate on the positive. Of the recent releases, Kaldheim grabbed my interest the least. I have not embraced the lore of Vikings as much as the average geek. You probably expect me to say, “Boy, was I wrong.” Usually when I set it up like that, I then respond with the opposite. However, the truth is that I’m basically holding out for the MTG/D&D set. In the meantime, join me as I take a look at Kaldheim Esper edition.
White (A Wrath, Exile, and Big Butt Oxen, Oh My!)
Honorable Mention (Giant Ox): An ox with a giant butt that can pilot vehicles? How can I not pick this card as one of my favorites from the set? That answer, of course, is that I can’t not pick it. This card is so much fun that I just committed a double negative on its behalf.
Honorable Mention (Divine Gambit): Regular readers of the page know that I often speak out against the fun police. This represents a do as I say and not as I do situation. I absolutely love playing the fun police. Therefore, I allow nobody else to play this strategy.
White Card I Love (Doomskar): I usually try to highlight some of the new mechanics with my picks. This one has Fortell, which is probably my favorite new mechanic from this set. I won’t insult your intelligence by explaining it since they literally wrote it on the card. Chris and I both agree that the designers got paid by the word in this set.
Blue (Draw Cards, Punish Timmies, and Storm Crow?)
Honorable Mention (Alrund, God of the Cosmos and Hakka, Whispering Raven): Speaking of getting paid by the word. There’s eight words in the name of this card alone. Aside from that, you said, “You’re not usually one for god cards.” That’s true. Chris is our Spike/Timmy and he goes for the god and dragon cards. I just couldn’t resist having “Storm Crow” in my review article.
Honorable Mention (Icebind Pillar): I just said to Chris yesterday, “I don’t know why, but snow lands trigger me terribly.” I feel like he lost some respect for me after I said that. That’s neither here nor there, of course. I like this card because it messes with other people’s plans. It’s no Winter Orb. But it can make for a bad day for the occasional Timmy that sneaks one big creature by my counterspells and removal.
Blue Card I Love (Behold the Multiverse): This is probably my favorite card from the entire set. It fortells. Scries. Draws cards. In a standard where blue cards blue, this one probably blues the hardest. Granted, the requisite 1BB counterspell exists and that also fortells. However, that fortell is much less versatile in my opinion. Hence, this cards gets the edge.
Black (Can this be reduced? An enchantment? A good card?)
Honorable Mention (Blood on the Snow): I wish this card got mana reduced with devotion or something. I know that isn’t a mechanic in this set, but they have gods. They could easily break the rules. They have in more recent sets. Yes, I realize that would make this card extremely broken. That hasn’t stopped them. Oh well, it’s still a symmetric wrath that I want to see the animation on MTGA.
Honorable Mention (Draugr Necromancer): In keeping with my theme of “I wish”, I wish this card was an enchantment. Again, I know that makes it terribly broken. Isn’t it about time that black gets a completely broken card that they threaten to ban before it’s even released?
Black Card I Love (Withercrown): I really don’t love this card. I just hate it the least out of all of the black cards in this set. I mean, I’ve seen some stupid combos out of black in this set, but I’m not a combo player. I’d rather just kill you with a thousand cuts from a thousand pieces of paper. Yes, I’m sadistic when it comes to MTG. But, you already knew that.
The Verdict (Kaldheim Esper edition cards are mostly underwhelming)
I think the only Esper card I’ve played from the set with any regularity is Behold the Multiverse. As I just said, I have seen some combos with the Tergrid cards. Also, I got got by double vision and the card that makes 1/1s and gives you extra turns. I just don’t like playing combo decks. The point is that some of you out there might find some cards that you enjoy better. That’s the great thing about MTG and the reason it’s still going after over 25 years. There’s something there for every play style. Join me in a couple of days for the Gruul cards from the set.
Spoiler images courtesy of Mythic Spoiler. Check them out for all your MTG spoiler needs.
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